FICTION: Reparation

Love DOES mean having to say you're sorry...

I sometimes wonder — if I hadn't already written CROSSING LINES — whether the One Son ep would have pushed me to start writing fic. As I recall, I was very quick in turning this one out and had really strong feelings about what had happened on the show.

In any case, REPARATION is a unique story of mine in that it is extremely representative of my take on the TXF mythology, which I generally never touch on in my fic. In this one, I literally put words and thoughts into the mouths and minds of Mulder and Scully to voice my opinion on the matter.

For instance, this from Scully: "...maybe it has something to do with the fact that every time we meet up with another clue to this government group conspiracy to hybridize humans with aliens, you — Well, let's just say that it brings back some unpleasant memories — memories that I technically don't even have, Mulder — and I wonder why we keep chasing after these carrots that they dangle in our faces. I mean, it's ludicrous! I can accept that some of this evidence is scientifically sound, but if we're to believe these stories, there's something like a half a dozen other-worldly types running around right under our noses trying to sabotage our species!"

And Mulder's thoughts here: Now, apparently, the latest and greatest news was that it hadn't been Samantha after all. Scully was right, what was the point in chasing after these ever-changing truths? It was like running around in a house of magic mirrors. Did he really believe that Armageddon was imminent for the planet the other night at the hangar? Why did it matter? If everything were true, wouldn't he and his loved ones be better off dead?

All pretty much my thoughts after having seen One Son.

But the main reason I wrote REPARATION was to have Mulder say the following: "Scully, of course everything between you and me is personal. I was a total ass to say that to you. I'm sorry I said it and I'm really sorry I said it in front of the guys."

Yes, he absolutely needed to apologize, and in "my world", he did.

And the thing is, I'm a big Mulder supporter and I identify with his character the most, but as feedback for REPARATION, I received an email from a reader who absolutely took me to task for bashing Mulder in this story... (I wish I'd kept a copy of the email.)